Lie Ren Goes to the Market
by Darty 794
Summary: Lie Ren goes to town to go shopping. He has a long list and a short time to get them. Will he find make it back to his team in time? This is my first story, but I'm a big boy, so don't hold back any criticism.
1. Chapter 1

Lie Ren of team JNPR awoke early this morning to go to the supermarket. The refrigerator was almost empty, and it was his turn to do the shopping. The night before, his teammates made a list of things to buy, as well as placed their money into a jar for young to use to purchase what was needed. The jar sat on a table at the end of the room, right next to the bathroom.

Ren looked to his left and saw the alarm clock by his bed. "3:53 am" the alarm clock read. The alarm was set to go off at 4:00 that morning. Ren sighed in relief that he awoke early, as the alarm might have awoken his teammates, and he did not want to make them angry by disturbing their peaceful sleep. So he quietly turned his alarm off as he crept out of bed, trying to make as little noise as possible as he moved to his closet.

The closet was filled with numerous clothes and other such attire, including an apron, a full-body bathing suit, and suit reserved for formal occasions. The last time he wore this suit was when he went to a dance with his friends. Jaune, his team leader, left the dance early and returned in a dress. Ren chuckled silently to himself as he remembered that night.

He grabbed his clothes for the day and headed for the bathroom. As he entered, he set the clothes by the sink before facing the laundry hamper and undressing, discarding the old clothes into the hamper before stepping into the shower. As he was showering, he was unaware that he grabbed the honey-scented shampoo that his childhood friend, Nora, always uses. She claims it helps bring sloths to her, though this claim had yet to be proven.

Upon finishing in the shower by washing away the suds and turning the shower knob to off, Ren dried himself off, put on deodorant, and got dressed. He then proceeded to brush his teeth. He scrubbed and scrubbed, front and back, until his smile was as white as pearly milk, although he rarely smiles so widely. As he walked out, he looked over his team.

Jaune, their "fearless" leader was sleeping contently in his blue onesie with a white rabbit on the front. Pyrrha slept on her side and tightly gripped her pillow. Ren had a few ideas as to why, but he kept them to himself. Nora, his best friend since their childhood, snored as loudly as ever. Ren knew that this was the most delicate situation to be in. Nora was dreaming about being an extremely light sleeper bear right now, and if woken up, she could and most likely would destroy the entire room in her half-sleep state of mind. So Ren crept quietly to the Lien for the day on the nightstand and made his way out the door silently.

Ren made his way down the halls and to the elevators. He could have taken the stairs, but he might have run into someone and he was not in a social mood today. He simply wanted to get in and get out of the store as quickly as possible. With the ring of a bell, the elevators doors opened to an occupant already inside. Inside was an older girl with chestnut brown bunny ears sprouting from her chestnut brown hair, someone Ren recognized as Velvet Scarletina, a second year student at Beacon academy.

"Hello." Velvet said softly.

Not wanting to be rude, Ren replied.

"Hello."

"Um, going down?" she asked, showing total lack of confidence.

Ren simply nodded and entered the elevator. It was cozy, in its' own way. The room was entirely gray, with only a dark brown for the floor to add a splash of color. Everything else was some form of gray. Chrome handlebars, silver walls, and an iron-alloy ceiling made up the room. The buttons were black numbers on a white background. Ren noticed that the star button was already pressed. Velvet was also heading toward the lobby.

Ren, for whatever reason he couldn't find decided to engage in small talk. Since this was Velvet, the only reason that made logical sense to him was to make the trip faster. Ren was more of a listener than a talker, but that didn't mean he couldn't strike up a conversation. So, stuck up.

"How have you been?" Ren asked with sincerity, but he was not prepared for what happened next.

"Oh, this past week has been just the worst!" Velvet sobbed out to the lad. "First, Cardin, that big bully, pulls on my ears for no reason again, and when I went to my team leader about it, she just said, "Velv, you need to stand up for yourself"-!" Ren took a moment to pause at how accurate Velvet's impersonation of her fashionista leader was. It wasn't, not even close. "Then I lost Yatsuhashi's stress ball when I borrowed it and now I can't find it anywhere. I took my eyes off of it for three whole minutes to make a wish in the school fountain, only for Fox to sneak up behind me and point out that the fountain wasn't meant for making wishes and that I should make my wishes come true on my own, but I don't know how!" Velvet stopped to take a very deep breath, making Ren question his decision of getting out of bed this morning. He could have sent someone else to pick up the groceries. Perhaps he could have coaxed Nora with the promise of sloth-shaped pancakes. He was snapped out of his thoughts when Velvet began again.

"So now Yatsuhashi wants his stress ball back today and I'm leaving early to go buy a replacement at the market before we see each other again, and I'm worried that everything will just go wrong!" She sobbed harder than before. She then sniffed and look at Ren with teary eyes. "So," she began, "how have you been?"

Ren was silent for a few moments before answering.

"I've been better."

The elevator door slowly opened and Velvet took off like a bullet towards the Bullheads, rapidly squeaking "I'm sorry to hear that" to Ren as she sped past him. Ren merely stood dumbstruck. He looked up at the clock tower across the courtyard and saw the current time. The massive tower of stone and gears read the time with big metal hands on its glass face.

"4:15," Ren repeated to himself, "not even half an hour after waking up and I'm already regretting this decision."


	2. Chapter 2

Ren continued his way to the Bullhead to catch the first flight to the Vale market. It was a big place. Vendors from all over Remnant gathered in one area to sell their goods, be they rare and exotic, or mundane and common. He pulled out the list attached to the jar containing their collective lien. He continued walking as he read the list.

"Weapon polish" was written in neat, blue letters, courtesy of their team leader, Jaune, who wrote down what he believed the team needed as well as only himself. The next couple of lines were written in Jaune's neat handwriting, "Shampoos", "shield polish", "needle and thread", and ending with "basic foods". The last line confused Ren the most. What did Jaune mean by "basic foods"? Did he mean food that was common to everyone, even the lesser intelligent and not as brawny? Did he mean the essentials for living a healthy life, including meat, vegetables, fruits, and grain and dairy products? Or did he mean food that the team always gets. If that were so, then there would be no need for Nora's list that followed.

In less than neat letters written in pink ink, Nora had written the names of numerous sweets, starting with "pancakes" and ending with something that ended in "R-O-N-G". Ren ignored it for a moment, as the rest of the list needed to be covered. Why the girl needed so many sweets was beyond the boy, but he accepted that it was Nora being Nora. He looked up from the list to see that he made it to the Bullhead station.

The next Bullhead destined for Vale was due to leave in the next twenty minutes. Wasting no time, Ren made his way there and found a seat after coming aboard. It was only after the Bullhead had taken off that Ren noticed the other passengers. There were only four other people in the flying machine with him: Velvet, the previously met rabbit-faunus with a missing back-bone, his teacher, Miss Goodwitch, who seemed to be hiding something, Neptune, the blue-haired suitor of the young heiress, Weiss Schnee, who was sitting next to him, currently gazing out the window with who knows on his mind. After his conversation with Velvet, he was hesitant to open anyone else's can of worms. So he sat in silence for as long as the trip would take.

The ride was smooth, no turbulence whatsoever. This was common, as it hardly rained in Vale, even in the spring and summer. It also explained why many people ride the Bullheads instead of simply walking or taking a bus. 'The safest and fastest way to travel', thought Ren, as he noticed their destination closing in. Actually, they were closing in on their destination, as it is absurd for land to move; not impossible, but absurd. The landing matched the flight and all the passengers waited until it was okay to stand up and leave the Bullhead. As they waited, Ren thought of how his motion-sickness-riddled leader would immediately stand up and run for the nearest trash can, if he had not already done so during the flight. Ren couldn't help but chuckle at the thought.

The captain's voice echoed from the PA system, his voice like that of someone who had flown more than his fair share of times: full of experience to know what to tell the passengers and how to do so. "Alright, folks, thank you for flying with us. We will now be opening the hatch. Please watch your step, and have a wonderful day. Please note that the last Bullhead departs back for Beacon at 1800, or six o'clock tonight for those of you who don't know. We will not leave any sooner nor later than that time. If you miss the Bullhead, I'm afraid you'll have to wait until 0300 tomorrow, or three o'clock in the morning. Again, have a wonderful day."

"Six o' clock." Ren repeated to himself as he left the Bullhead station. He pulled out his scroll to check the time. The screen read, ironically, "6:00 am". Ren had twelve hours to return by Bullhead, or he would be forced to stay in a nearby hotel, which was not only expensive, but also notorious for its' unsavory types. He decided to sleep in a hotel as a last resort. Having settled that, he set his sights on the city around him.

His first destination would be the weapons shop, since foods were perishable. He walked until he came across the downtown square of Vale, filled with bustling people on the move, destination after destination on their mind. He looked at the map on his scroll and decided that the best route to the weapon's store was straight forward. As he walked, he noticed something off in the crowd. There was a young girl, younger than Ruby, the leader of team RWBY, speaking with larger men, and based on their tone, it didn't sound good. He slowly made his way over, listening closely to their conversation.

"It is as I have told you, sir," the girl said, "I was walking by when your vehicle hit me. I fail to see why I should pay for the damages, when you were the one who hit me." Now closer, Ren got a better look at the girl. She had pale skin, light red hair that reminded him much of Nora, freckles dotting her face, and she wore a white and green dress-skirt with black leggings, all topped with an adorable red bow on the top of her head. In a word, she was cute, like a porcelain doll.

The men did not look as cute. One was bald with a bushy beard and a big scar over his face, going across his right eye, and was blocked over the eye by an eye-patch. He was wearing a white tank-top, leaving nothing to the imagination with his huge biceps and pectorals, and cargo pants. He was about Ren's height, while his colleague were shorter, both about Ruby's height. One wore a blue shirt with green stripe and the other wore a green shirt with blue stripes, and matching jeans. They were also bald, but much less clean than their taller associate. They surrounded the girl like pack of wolves would a sheep, but she showed no fear. In fact, her face was that of a child who had just gotten their favorite flavor of ice cream.

"Again, my name is Penny," she reiterated, "and I am sorry that I ruined your car. Perhaps my uncle could build you a new one. After all, he built me- I mean, my clothes for me!" ending her sentence with a loud hiccup.

"There she goes again, making up those lies about her uncle!" the blue shirted colleague exclaimed. "As if he could be General Ironwood!"

This really got Ren's interest. There wasn't a hunter worth their weapons who never heard of the most powerful military leader of the kingdom of Atlas, General James Ironwood. If this really was his daughter, then she might be in bigger trouble than previously thought. Ren immediately interrupted the conversation between the thugs and the girl, taking a deep sigh before following it with a deep breath.

"Excuse me, Ms. Penny?" Ren inquired, drawing the attention of the group. Swallowing whatever was in his throat at the time, Ren continued. "My name is… Mr. … Woodiron, and you uncle recommended that we meet." When it came to lies, Lie Ren was second to none- at being the worst.

But the girl, be it from understanding of her current situation or pure naiveté, which Ren suspected to be the latter, accepted Ren's invitation. The two were about to walk away when Ren felt a tight grip on his right arm, followed by a deafening "Hold it!". The two turned around to see the three men glaring them down, with the leader holding Ren's arm. "You're saying this girl is really the niece of General Ironwood, the great military leader of Atlas?" he questioned.

Ren had a nervous look on his face. Even he had his doubts about this fact, but he trusted this girl to not be a liar, so he pushed down those doubts and replied, "Yes. Yes, she is." Ren prepared for the worst, which he suspected to be these men not believing him and squashing them like bugs. This did happen, however.

"Oh! I see! We're very sorry about that!" said the leader, a large smile now covering his once intimidating face, "We had no idea! If there's anything we can do to help you out, let us know!" Ren didn't notice the leader signal to his friends to sneak up behind the two and quietly plant tracking devices on their backs, which they did.

Ren thought for a moment, then pulled out his shopping list. Topping the list was weapon polish, so he inquired about that. "Do you know where I can buy weapon polish?"

The large man in front of them continued to smile his toothy grin and replied, "Oh, yes! It is right over there," he exclaimed, pointing to his left, "it should be inside that dust shop there!" Ren saw the Schnee Dust Company's small outlet store.


	3. Chapter 3

While the store was larger than every other in the square, it was still smaller compared to their other outlet stores. As they walked in through the automatic doors, they heard the ringing chime of said doors, announcing their arrival.

Ren looked around at the slow to steady business in the building, as there were only a few customers here and there. He walked around the story, keeping his eyes open for weapon polish. If there was some device you needed to accessorize your weapon with, it could be found in a dust shop. Standing behind the counter in the center of the small building was a balding elderly man. He smiled and waved at the two, which Penny returned with a smile and wave of her own. The counter had glass windows, which acted as the only barrier between the rainbow variety of dust and any sticky-fingered thieves.

Ren walked up to the counter to question the clerk about polish. Before Ren could say anything, however, Penny did.

"Salutation, store owner!" she chimed in her chipper and cheerful manner.

"Hello, but uh, I'm not the owner," the clerk answered, "I just serve customers with a smile."

"It's still a noble task you were given! You get to serve quality products to paying customers at a reasonable price!" From the way she was speaking, it sounded like Penny was trying to boost the man's spirits while also advertise his job to him. Almost as though she were made for such a task.

The man smiled and even blushed a little bit. "Well, th-thank you, miss, but-."

"Not to mention that without you, your customers wouldn't be able to get such service. They would have to go to the competition, which both offer poor service and shoddy products! Can you imagine if customers went to Blak Coal's? I certainly don't want to!"

The old man behind the counter smiled brightly. "I'm glad you said that. I wasn't feeling too sure about this job since we were robbed a couple months back, but hearing you tell me that is so reassuring that I made the right choice for this job. Thank you!" He then noticed the tall boy standing next to the girl. With a smile still on his face, he announced proudly, "Welcome to Schnee Dust Company Outlet, where convenience and quality meet as one! How can I help you?" Other customers stared for a moment before returning to their previous shopping activities.

"Sensational!" Penny exclaimed with joy.

Surprised at what happened, Ren simply shook his head and inquired. "I'm looking for weapon polish."

"Oh, that's over there by the window! I'll be here, ready to help any time!"

Ren nodded and turned, walking over to the window to his right. There, he found three different kinds of weapon polish: light, heavy, and waxy. He was not experienced with telling the difference. Penny looked over his shoulder, chiming in her opinion.

"I usually get the waxy, but that's just me!"

Without turning, Ren replied. "To be honest, I don't know the difference."

Penny answered, "Light is for daily cleaning, and heavy is for more difficult stains on less maintained weaponry. The waxy polish is more cosmetic and meant to give the weapon and more aesthetically pleasing look."

Ren understood what Penny was saying, and chuckled as he knew that his friends Nora and Jaune wouldn't understand that Penny was saying that waxy was just for making things look nice. Since there were four in their team, Jaune had to buy at least four packs. The pricing varied, with light being the cheapest and heavy being the most expensive. Also, the polish came with a varying number of wipes: light had one hundred cloths, heavy with fifty, and waxy with twenty. He thought of his team. He himself was more of a daily cleaner, as was Pyrrha. Jaune tries, but he misses a few days sometimes. Nora's weapons sometimes jammed and sent her flying backwards, so that answered that question. Before making his decision, he turned to Penny.

"Do you want any?" he asked.

"I don't want you to waste your money." Penny responded,

"It's not a waste if it's for a friend."

Ren suddenly felt something grip on his shoulder like a vice, growing tighter until he turned to see Penny, who wore a look of shock on her face. Her entire body trembled as she mumbled something. Ren couldn't understand her.

"Um, say again?"

"Am I your friend?" she asked with her voice shaking, as though her life depended on the answer.

Ren decided it was best to answer honestly. "After all that's happened, I'd say so."

Penny released her grip and covered her mouth. Tears started coming down her cheeks as she wrapped her arms around Ren, making her grip on his shoulder feel like a tug from a child by comparison.

"Sensational!" Penny cheered with glee. This would make for her second friend! "I would like the waxy one!"

Ren nodded as he grabbed one heavy, three light, and one waxy. He brought the five boxes to the counter, and reached into his robes for the jar. Once out, he set it down on the counter and opened the lid. Once he heard the price, Ren paid a little more, since he didn't have change. After receiving his change, with his good in a shopping bag, Ren left the building, with Penny waving to the clerk.

"Hey, Penny?" Ren started.

"Yes, friend Ren?" Penny answered.

"Why did you say those things to that store clerk?"

"He was unhappy. His morale was low and that was bad for business. Poor business means a poor paycheck, and Schnees are not the forgiving type."

"How do you know?"

"My uncle does business with them!"

"General Ironwood?"

"Yep! Besides, my best friend tells me that if you can help somebody, you should!"

Ren still found it difficult to believe that someone as cold and tactical as General James Ironwood of Atlas would be a father-figure to such a sweet, though albeit strange, young girl. 'Then again,' Ren thought, 'the world's full of unbelievable things.'

"Where to next?" Penny asked this time.


	4. Chapter 4

Ren pulled out his list and noted that the next item was shampoo. He then put the list back and swapped it for his scroll to check the time. It was 10:17 in the morning. There was still plenty of time to explore, but before he could nominate their next destination, his stomach had a point to make.

"It appears you are experiencing borborygmus," Penny noted, "also known as 'the tummy rumbles'! Did you eat breakfast this morning?"

Ren thought quietly to himself. He wanted to leave as early as possible, but he didn't consider eating breakfast first. He shook his head to Penny. He then looked around for a nearby café or fast food restaurant. He was hungry, but he wasn't interested in waiting all day for a meal. He then immediately spotted a small café just across from the hygienics store.

Turning to Penny, he asked, "Are you hungry?"

Penny looked as those she had a million thoughts running through her head. After about a minute of thinking, she responded. "Yes."

Making their way through the crowd, they eventually made it to their destination, where they sat down, waiting for the waitress to hand them menus and take their order. With impeccable service in mind, a blonde woman in glasses and wearing her café uniform walked up to the table with a smile on her face.

"Hello! Welcome to the Schnee Café! My name is Glynda, and I will be your waitress! How may I-?"

"Miss Goodwitch?"

Horrified, the waitress removed her glasses to clean them to make sure she wasn't seeing things. She wasn't. She saw one of her students sitting at a table at her second job. Her _secret_ second job. The jig was up for Beacon professor Glynda Goodwitch.

Glynda was always viewed with three things by her students: dignity, pride, and fear. Seeing her in a waitress uniform, working an honest Jill's shift (who was not as honest as she claimed, since she called in sick for work, then walked past the restaurant not 20 minutes ago), was disillusioning. She wasn't some disciplinarian who ruled the halls of Beacon with an iron crop anymore. She was as human as anyone else in that restaurant.

"I will have the egg salad," said Penny, totally oblivious to both the current situation and what an egg salad was, "with fries on the side! Nothing to drink, please!"

Glynda sighed and pulled out a pen and scribbled on her notepad. "And for you, sir?" she asked, defeated.

Ren looked over his menu again. Everything was cheap, but he didn't have much to pay out of pocket. He had enough in the jar for all the items, plus the Bullhead ride home. 'I should have eaten at Beacon. Their food is freed.' Ren thought.

"Is it possible for me to just get fries?" he asked.

Glynda sighed as she scribbled. "Yes, I suppose. And to drink?"

"Just water."

Scribbling one last time, Glynda took the order to the counter after giving the usual "thank you" and "we will let you know when your order is ready". Since there was time while the food was being made, Ren decided to make small talk.

"It's a beautiful day outside."

"Yes, and forecasts detect that it will continue like this for 3.849 days!"

Ren wasn't sure if he should be impressed or worried about that exact measurement. Then again, she's the niece of General Ironwood. Perhaps Ren should push on that.

"Hey, Penny?"

"Yes?"

"You said your uncle was General Ironwood."

"Yup!" she said with a smile, "He was there when I was… born." She hiccupped. Odd, since Ren hadn't seen her eat or drink one thing since meeting this girl.

"What's it like?" Penny stiffened herself at the question.

"T-to be born?" Ren sighed internally. She was almost as bad as Nora.

"No, being the niece of a powerful man like Ironwood." Suddenly a roar of laughter erupted from the kitchen, followed by one of the employees asking Glynda what was so funny.

"Oh, well it's okay, I suppose. He's kind, but strict. He's harsh, but reasonable. He's tough, but fair. He's-" Penny continued listing his pros and cons as such until the order finally arrived.

"Will there be anything else?" Glynda said, clearly distressed about her cover being blown.

"Would you mind explaining why you're so stressed out?" Penny said, slightly disappointed that her egg "salad" was more like an egg sandwich. "Your stress levels have been on the rise since Ren recognized you, though it seems to have fallen a bit not too long ago." At least the fries looked good.

Sighing, the Beacon professor who moonlighted as a waitress, knew she might as well. They had no customers and, even if they did, she was told to go on her break after finishing this order. She pulled out a chair and sat on it before saying, "Where do you want me to start?"

Ren paused for a moment, thinking of the right question. He planned to ask her when and why she got this job. Was the pay not good enough as a professor? Was she so shallow that she liked the uniforms? Or perhaps her reason is-

"How do you know Uncle Ironwood?" Ren sighed as Penny asked first while figuring out what an egg salad is called the way it is.

"James and I attended Beacon together". Glynda answered. "He never told me he had a brother or sister. He's usually so open with me."

Penny went as wide-eyed as a Beowolf caught underfoot of a Goliath. "Um, well, you see, that is- Classified!"

Ren was caught off-guard by Pennys' sudden outburst. Glynda just sighed.

"I suppose that's how he is now. We used to be so close, and now…" She sighed again.

"Why did you get a job here?" Ren inquired.

"Honestly? I'm just making some extra Lien."

"But don't professors at Beacon get paid a hefty sum?"

"Yeah, but it's spent on Dust, Grimm, and supplies for teaching. There's only enough left over for the essentials."

"Essentials?" It was now or never for her. She had to eat and see if this "egg salad" was worth it. She took a bite, chewed, and swallowed… and nearly gagged. It was awful! It's a good thing it was cheap. Glynda continued with her story.

"Food, water, shelter; all needed for the human body to survive. Unlike the Grimm, we actually need to eat. Maybe it was a mistake becoming a huntress. This "war" has been more like a one-sided fight since day one for me. Day after day, we struggle, and we keep losing ground. Soon, there won't be any ground left to lose."

Miss Goodwitch looked like she had just hit rock bottom. Ren could understand her feelings. A lot of hunters join for various reasons: money, fame, or just to hunt Grimm. The only wrong reason to join, in Ren's opinion, was to join to sabotage the effort.

"Why a waitress?"

"Because no one else was offering. They all either had enough employees, or not enough Lien to pay one more."

"What do you need the extra cash for?"

She was silent for a moment, deep in thought, before replying, "I have my reasons."

This was getting nowhere fast. Ren had somehow put his professor into a hole that she couldn't climb out of. For the first time in his life, he asked himself, 'What would Jaune do?' No doubt make a fool of himself, only to recover somehow, like saying something inspiring or making people smile, and live to fight another day. Maybe Ren could do something like that, but without the looking like a fool.

Ren finished his fries, and Penny, being taught not to waste food, ate the whole egg salad that tasted like the inside of a sweaty gym sock. Ren put down his out of pocket Lien and walked away from the now depressed waitress.

"For what it's worth, I think we're about to make a comeback. We may be losing ground right now, but that's fine, because we have somebody at our backs, pushing us forward. And that person has someone behind them, and behind them, and behind them, and behind them until we form one giant line that will push back. We have something the Grimm don't." Ren looked back to see if she was listening. She was, and she looked like an eager student learning from their favorite teacher. "Each other's backs."

She smiled, earning a smile right back from her student. Penny also smiled, but it was more peer pressure for her, wanting to be in the group.

"Don't worry about me telling the others. I won't tell anyone else." And just like that, Glynda wasn't sad anymore. She felt renewed, refreshed, and ready to take on whatever comes her way.

"I expect to see you in class tomorrow, Mr. Lie!" she shouted.

"Will do!" He shouted back.

Ren exited the restaurant and pulled out his list.

Looking at the time, Ren saw that it was now 10:54 in the morning, a little more than five minutes until 11. Ren pulled out his list and saw that shampoo was next on his list.


	5. Chapter 5

11:46.

It was 11:46, just fourteen minutes from noon.

Since he had a late breakfast, Ren expected to not be hungry for another few hours. However, a new issue arose; he couldn't find his next destination. He found the map, yes, but for some reason, he couldn't figure out which store it was in. Was it Schnee Style? Or was it Squeaky Schnee? He could try his luck in "Bunks, Brooch, and Schnee-ond!"

"That last one could use a second opinion!" Penny piped up.

Ren replied, "I'm sure they tried their best, much like we are." He turned to face his new friend. "Do you know what the difference between them are?"

Penny stared off into the distance before answering. "Schnee Style is a cosmetologist educational center, Squeaky Shcnee is a beautician parlor, and 'Bunks, Brooch, and Shcnee-ond!' is a store for furnishings, jewelry, and miscellaneous items. I recommend-!"

"Come on, Neptune!" a shrill voice cried out, "You promised me we'd go somewhere I wanted, and I would appreciate it if you didn't drag your feet!"

Ren turned and found the source to be Weiss Schnee, heiress to the Schnee Dust (and competition dominating) Company, accompanied by her much taller and bluer, ahem, "boyfriend". Ren knew a few things about her; the aforementioned heiress title, the interest his leader had in her, the disinterest she had in his leader, her position in team RWBY, and her violently short temper. He recalls numerous times when his leader would leave with a gift of some sort, be it in song, with flowers or other such gifts, or simply the offer to go on a date with him. He always returned in similar fashion; sometimes with his instrument ringing around his head, sometimes with the gifts shoved into his mouth, but always with a dejected look on his face. He'd then explain to Ren how it went, usually against the pink-strip of hair boy's will.

However he looked at it, two things were clear; he didn't know where to go, and she did.

"Penny?"

"Yes, friend Ren?"

"We're going to ask Weiss for help."

"Do you believe that will work?" Penny questioned. "She appears quite agitated."

"She's the only one who knows where we need to go."

"Very well." And with that, they began following the two. They couldn't find Weiss through the crowd, due to her, ahem, ability to blend in with crowd, and not her stature (Mother Schnee always said that she was at a perfectly normal height for her age). Luckily, her, ahem again, "boyfriend" was tall with easy to identify hair.

Ren followed the blue hair until it stopped in front of Squeaky Schnee. Ren and Penny made their way up to Neptune.

"Excuse me." Ren started.

"Ren?!" Weiss cried in a startled voice. Ren couldn't tell if her red face indicated she was embarrassed or angry (most likely both). "W-What are you doing here?!"

"Hey, Ren!" Neptune said, in a familiar tone, despite not actually interacting with the emerald-robed boy. He then noticed the pale-skinned red-head next to him. "Who's your cute friend?"

Neptune felt a sharp pain on the back of his shin. He turned and saw an angry Shcnee glaring at him.

"Salutations! I am Penny, and we have already met, friend Weiss!"

Weiss groaned. "Hello, Penny. How are you?" Ren hadn't felt this much love in the air since that Beowolf encounter on last week's mission.

"I am doing well! Friend Ren and I were looking to you for-!"

"Wait!" Weiss interrupted, followed by a pointing finger, "You two are friends?"

"Yes! Ren said I was his friend, and I accepted!"

Weiss sighed. 'Poor Ren. He has no idea what he got himself into.' "So, what is it you two want? I'm a little busy."

"We just need directions to-"

"Busy with what?" It was Penny's turn to interrupt.

"Weiss thought it would be a great idea for us to bond with some hair care." Neptune answered.

"It will! I guarantee that by the end of this, we'll be closer than ever!" Weiss then cackled internally. 'And I don't just mean socially.'

"Well, that's nice," Ren said, "but we're just asking about-"

And Neptune completed the cycle of interruption. "Why don't you guys join us? The more the merrier!"

With another glare, Weiss exclaimed, "That sounds like a-!"

"Fantastic idea!" Penny turned to Ren. "Friend Ren, shall we join them? You seem incredibly stressed, and this might help you relax by about 18.79%!"

Ren looked at the time: twelve minutes after noon. He had less than six hours to gather the rest of the items on the list, or be forced to stay until three in the morning tomorrow. He desperately wanted to turn down the offer, but it seemed futile at this point. "Okay, I suppose we could spare some time."

"Sensational! Then let us begin!"

The four walked into the Squeaky Schnee. Weiss spoke for the group and paid for four separate treatments. They all would receive manicures, Weiss and Penny would receive pedicures, Neptune and Ren would get their hair washed, and Weiss would get her hair styled. Ren seated himself closest to the door. Penny sat between him and Neptune, who seated himself between Penny and Weiss.

They all sat back and relaxed as they had their fingernails washed, scrubbed, rinsed, and filed. The beauticians broke eight different files on Penny's fingers before giving up. Weiss was too far away and Ren was too worried about the time to care, but Neptune watched in horror as the biggest file they had, bigger than his hand and three times thick, broke in half. He never felt like less of a man than right now, in a beauty salon, next to a girl three times smaller than him that just broke something that you could use to bust out of prison.

"Do not worry, Neptune! None of this makes you any less masculine than you are now."

Neptune smiled at the reassurance, turning his gaze to the work of the beauticians. He held out his hand, palm out with his fingers extended, and blew on the handiwork.

"I detect that you masculinity has dropped 38%! I recommend you cease your actions and rethink your life choices."

Neptune sunk at that.

"So," Weiss started, "why are you in Vale?"

Ren assumed Weiss was asking him, so he answered. "I'm just out getting supplies."

"Really? And you decided to bring Penny with you instead of your team?"

Ren looked over at Penny. "Actually, I just met her today, and we're already friends. Can you believe that?"

"Hard as it may seem, I can."

"So it happened to you?"

"No, but it did to Ruby. She seems to have that effect on people. She hangs around you for less than a day, then suddenly you're best friends. It's…" Weiss paused for a moment to find the right words, "refreshing."'

"Refreshing?"

"Back in Atlas, no one was friends with Weiss Schnee, Huntress-in-Training. They were friends with Weiss Schnee, heiress to the Schnee Dust Company." Weiss grimaced for a moment. "The only friends I really had were my sister and our servants. Then she left, and some of the servants did as well, or was fired. One of them called in sick because he saw a piece of toast soaking in water. Father never did forgive him for that."

"Sounds a lot like Scarlet, to be honest." Neptune chimed in.

"Speaking of teams, you didn't answer me when I asked about why you didn't bring yours. I can understand not bringing tall, blonde, and scraggly, but I thought you and Nora were best friends. Pyrrha would have also been acceptable as well, I'm sure."

"Nora likes to sleep in, and Jaune and Pyrrha have their… outing together." Jaune made Ren and Nora promise not to tell anyone about his secret rooftop training.

"Outing? Now you need to tell me."

Dust damn it.

"I promised Jaune and Pyrrha I wouldn't tell a soul about it."

"Even Nora?"

"They made her promise as well."

Weiss decided to take the negotiating approach. "I'll tell you what Yang likes to do when nobody's watching."

"You mean when she practices her puns in the mirror?" Neptune asked.

"Neptune!" Weiss scolded.

"Penny!" the redhead exclaimed as she picked up the foreign currency off the tiled floor. Or rather, as she extended her arm to inhuman lengths to pick it up. The other three were the only ones oblivious to the current situation. Everyone else looked on in horror. "I am truly lucky today!"

"I'm sorry, Weiss, but I cannot break my promise. I'm sure you'd never sell out your friends if it was something important to them, right?"

Weiss thought for a moment. Yang's pun practice and the absence of everyone else was pure coincidence. The only reason she knew was that Yang was so into her puns, she didn't notice Weiss walking in (only to make a U-turn back out the door when she heard just one pun). Now, if it was something like a certain Faunus' secret…

"You're right. I couldn't do that to any of my teammates. Is there any way I can make it up to you?"

Ren thought about why he followed Weiss in the first place. "Actually, yes. I'm looking for a place that sells shampoo, conditioner, and other toiletries."

"Oh, that's all? Try "Bunks, Brooch, and Schnee-ond!" Ugh… I really need to talk to Whitely about that name."

"Um, actually…" One of the beauticians piped up. "They stopped selling hair care products there since the lotion incident three weeks ago."

"Ugh! That's right! The lotion incident! Why didn't they just ban children instead of the products involved?" Weiss looked to the beauticians; "Excuse me, but may my friend take some of your shampoo? Just a few bottles?"

"We're sorry, Miss Schnee, but we can't just give these bottles to customers. Our boss wouldn't have it!"

"I'm sorry, but who is your boss?"

"Um," the beauticians looked at each other, "your father?"

"And who am I?"

"Wei-"

"That's right! I'm Weiss Schnee, heiress to the Schnee Dust Company, and all its affiliates, which includes you and just about every store in this square. Now, I recommend you let me handle my father while you give my friend the products he desires. Do I make myself clear?"

"But, Miss Schnee-!"

"DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!"

"Yes, Miss Schnee! Right away, Miss Schnee!" The beauticians then ran off to get the products ready.

"Was that really necessary? They were just doing their jobs." Neptune defended.

"Father once told me, "If you give them an inch, they'll take a mile and think themselves a ruler". He also told me I was dumber than a blind Beowolf one time, so who cares about him?"

As she paid for their treatment and… other pleasantries, Weiss walked out with a flair while the other three followed close behind.

"Anything else?" Weiss inquired.

Ren looked at his list, then at his scroll. It was now 3:32. Somehow, some way, Ren had just lost 4 hours of the day being treated. He walked in to be stress free, and now he was more stressed than before, despite his face not showing it. "Just the groceries."

"SDC Mart should be down that way." The heiress pointed as she spoke. "Now, if you'll excuse us, Neptune and I need to start heading off. He's treating me to a wonderful dinner tonight!" Neptune felt his arm and his heart break from Weiss snuggling into him and learning he was to pay for their dinner. "Bye, Ren!" They then became lost in the crowd.

"Friend Ren, I did not want to alarm the others, but your stress levels are double of when you entered the beauticians. Is something the matter?"

Ren took a deep breath. "Just pressed for time. Nothing to worry about."

As they made their way, around the corner three familiar men spied on the two as they made their way to the SDC Mart. "Boss said he had a trap waiting for them in there, and if he means who I think he means, they are gonna be busted up big time!"


End file.
